after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Randomize
