just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
This is my life. Enjoy the view
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
