a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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