Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
