I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
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