She's JV to your varsity
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
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