Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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