Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
