Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
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