Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Randomize
