imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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