# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
