whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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