It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize