yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
