I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Randomize
