i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize