Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize
