So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Randomize