She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
