Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Randomize
