No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
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