Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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