end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
we're chasing vodka with high fives
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
