Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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