To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
