I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
