Can i not drive my cunt home
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
