just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
babies were throwing up all over the place
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
