He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Sober January is a disaster.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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