Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Randomize
