She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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