It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize