even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
