You made me cry and you don't even care
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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