he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
