Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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