Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
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