i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Can Purell be used as lube?
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Randomize
