I hate all girls vehemently.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize