The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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