you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
