If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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