Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize