I wannas sexs uuuuu
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
