This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
My ass is underappreciated
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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