i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Randomize
