i always forget guys have bellybuttons
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
