Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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