So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize